Sweet baby Jane, this is how you came to be.
Long before you were here, you were loved and wanted, not only by Mommy and Daddy, but by everyone in the family.
I still remember when we found out I was pregnant – you were only the size of a poppy seed at the time, a tiny but very precious poppy seed.
It felt like the weeks were going by so slowly. You then were the size of a blueberry, and eventually of a lemon. Every week when we did groceries, I would find the fruit or vegetable you compared to in size and hold it so dearly in my hands. I’d say, “Look Hans, that’s how big baby is this week!”
Little by little you grew and so did my belly. We eventually found out we were expecting a sweet baby girl, but that’s nothing Mommy and Daddy didn’t know already.
It was around 30 weeks of pregnancy that everything changed. We had our first meeting with Catherine, our Doula. She told us about the birthing center in Blainville. Mommy had no idea we even had those around here, but I knew I had to call first thing in the morning. Even though I knew my chances of getting in were slim to none, Mommy never lost hope. I prayed and prayed, because I knew if they could find room for us, then I’d have a shot at the birth story I had been hoping for. You can imagine my disappointment when they called me back and told me they were fully booked. I wasn’t surprised, to say the least, but extremely disappointed.
A few days later, my phone rang. I checked the caller ID and immediately got excited when I saw it was the birthing center. Why would they be calling me? They must’ve found a way to squeeze me in! I answered the phone and tried to contain my excitement, but I don’t think I fooled anyone. I had to go meet my midwife ASAP, because I was only two days shy from being too far along for a “suivi sage-femme.”
The next day, I went to meet Ariane. I was completely blown away; she was warm, welcoming and extremely helpful. Within an hour of meeting with her, I felt like more of my questions had been answered than during my entire pregnancy up until then.
It was just around that time when your name finally came to Mommy: Jane. Daddy loved it right away. It was a name for a strong, elegant, smart, and independent little girl. It suited your energy that Mommy was feeling so strongly. That’s when we knew your name had finally been whispered to us.
The weeks went by and my belly grew some more, and then some more. Your due date was getting closer and closer, and I was really looking forward to holding you in my arms. I was nervous and excited at the idea of giving birth, but I knew it would all be worth it.
37 weeks arrived and I was really excited. This was a huge milestone for us, because it meant you were officially full term and Mommy had done her job of keeping you safe. We were officially ready for you!
Around 38 weeks I became very determined. I went for walks every night, ate a bunch of dates, had plenty of raspberry leaf tea, and even got a bouncy ball. I didn’t want to wait any longer! I was in baby mode.
I will always remember that very first contraction. It was Saturday, October 24th at 1 o’clock in the morning. Though it was a little painful, I got so excited! I had been told to not start counting the contractions until they felt regular, because you were my first baby and sometimes it can take days. I went back to bed, but couldn’t sleep. The contractions seemed to come often, but I was never really a good judge of time anyway.
At 2 o’clock, I knew it was time I woke up Daddy. “Hans, it’s happening! It’s time.” We both smiled out of excitement, even though I have to admit, I was a little bit nervous. Daddy jumped out of bed and started getting things ready. He started counting my contractions and we soon realized they were only a few minutes apart. I was confused, it’s wasn’t supposed to happen this fast…I was secretly hoping we were further along than expected, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up, because after all, it’s not supposed to happen so quickly with your first baby.
It didn’t take long before we decided it was time to call Ariane. Although the timing of my contractions was good, they needed to be a little more intense. In the following hour, my contractions did exactly that. I knew at that point, there was no slowing down.
We called Ariane back and she could immediately hear it in my voice. This mama was in labor and you, my baby Jane, were officially on your way.
I took a minute to talk to you. “We’ve got this, baby Jane. We’re going to do great.” I prayed and visualized a quick and easy birth. I visualized the moment I’d finally hold you in my arms after 9 months of waiting.
After what felt like the longest car ride of my life, we finally arrived at the birthing center. Immediately the contractions grew even stronger. Ariane confirmed what I had been hoping for – we had already done a huge amount of work. I was so happy and excited. I even think Daddy and I took a moment to high-five each other. I knew he was proud of us already.
Daddy was such a good help. Thanks to the birthing classes we did at home, he knew exactly what to do to help Mommy. He quickly set up the speakers we brought and played the playlist I carefully made to welcome you into the world. The lights were dimmed, soft music was playing, and a gentle smell of lavender filled the air. It felt like time had stopped. It was beautiful and surreal.
And then time went by really fast. It was contraction after contraction, and I wasn’t getting any breaks. I think that’s the part moms forget, because that’s when things get very intense. To tell you the truth, I don’t remember much either.
Soon enough my instincts kicked in and I felt the need to push. I immediately felt empowered. In that moment, I was stronger than I had ever been in my life. I felt like a woman, a strong and powerful woman capable of anything. I was determined. “We’ve got this, baby Jane, we’re doing great!” The sound of your heartbeat was steady and strong. I felt so proud of my baby girl. She too, was a strong and powerful little lady.
Not long after, my water finally ruptured. It did quite the mini explosion and even splashed in Kim’s face. Even though things were intense, we all laughed.
It felt like it took forever, but it was only 18 minutes later when you were placed in our arms. “My baby, my baby!” I kept saying. “We did it, it’s over. We did it!” I thanked God, and had never felt more blessed in my life as I held you in my arms. You were so small. We admired your features, your brown hair, your little fingernails, especially the pinky, and listened to all your little baby sounds. We were absolutely in love. You were a beautiful and healthy baby girl born at 7:16 AM, weighing 7lb, 9oz and measuring 19 inches long.
As I recall the moments leading up to your birth you’re currently sleeping on me. You’re exactly six weeks old today and thriving. I am so thankful every day that you are in our lives. It is such an honor to be your mom. There’s no love in the world that compares to the love I have for you. This kind of love is indescribable, unconditional. . .it’s so pure and beautiful, yet so simple.