ETA: I wrote this a few months ago and did not follow through. In the past few days I decided to do what I knew what right for me. I want to help everyone and while that’s noble, I tend to not help myself. I’m very good at forgetting about me so I can take care of and support others. I love Birth Without Fear. Of course I do. I started it! However, it began with the sole purpose of informing women they have other birth options when I realized so many women just did not know.
BWF grew and grew and that’s amazing, but I feel part of my purpose was lost in the world that is Facebook and it just sucked me in and took me for a ride. I am taking control again in many aspects of my life, including BWF. The source of info is here, in this blog. This is where I can serve others, speak up, educate, support…in my own healthy way. Please support me in this new chapter. It’s hard to let go of things sometimes, but really when it’s right, it will open up so much more.
My oldest daughter (9 years old) gave me a high 5 when I told her I was off FB. I will continue on with the BWF Blog with her enthusiasm! I hope that many of you will continue to read an share.
Love, January
I want to keep my last blog post up forever, but I have the itch to blog. I have been off of Facebook for over a week now. I love it. Really, I do. You might be surprised to know that I am actually not a fan of most social media. I somehow ended up with a big social media page and Blog. It was an outlet for me at a time I needed it and a way for me to reach out and help others while staying home with the kids. However, it no longer benefits the need for an ‘outlet’. Actually it suffocates me, drains me and leaves me feeling worn out.
In moving away from FB the last 10 days or so, I have been amazed at the change my daily life has taken. It is simply eye opening how much time I really do have when not fussing with trying to get enough posts out or babysit threads. All of the things I have said I don’t have time for…well, now I do!
I still love to write, share and support. I still plan on posting birth stories, informative posts, opinion pieces, pictures and more. I just want to do it on a schedule that is healthy for me. And that is OK!
Homeschooling is where we are right now. I am not a zealous homeschooler that thinks those that do not do so are uncaring parents, raising evil kids. Actually if we lived by a good school, my kids would be there. However, we have found ourselves in a situation where homeschooling is best (for now). I am not a teacher. I am a mother. I am intelligent and caring. I can do this. I have time to do this (now). It is amazing. I am learning so much about myself, finding a love for learning, and teaching. My kids are enjoying all the interaction with mom.
I am more organized. I am content. I am satisfied. I am happy.
My healthier ‘outlet’ is Pinterest. I can go on there and spend 5 minutes or an hour, depending on if I have the time and if kids are in bed. I love Pinterest. First, it’s jut uplifting and beautiful. The pictures all posted together can be so inspiring. Also, I can gather great information for all interests in my life and I apply them! I love that I can share blog posts, websites and more without debates. Without getting sucked in. It is a great solution and happy medium.
So, I am here. I still care. I still want to inform and support women in their birthing choices. I have strong opinions, but support all women’s educated choices. I am homeschooling. I have time and am more organized. I do not miss Facebook and I love Pinterest.
Follow me on Pinterest here. I will be sharing/posting new blog post only there for now. You can also subscribe to the BWF Blog. Those are the two ways you can make sure to see new posts, birth stories and more.
With love from me to you,
P.S. A new birth story to come soon…
Recommended Reading
The Making of a Confident Woman and Mother
ACOG: Post Dates is Past 42 Weeks
A Birth Photographers First Home Birth Experience
Post Dates Birth at the Farm
Moms Get a Thank You Card for Breastfeeding in Public
Birth of Tyler {Home Birth}
A Mother’s Day Birth Story
A Perfect Water Birth After Traumatic Birth and Following Hard Pregnancy
Completing Our Family, Part III {A Story of Loss and Hope in Three Parts}
Emily’s Birth Story
35 Comments
Michelle @ Simplify, Live, Love
I’ve been a FB lurker for sometime now. I can’t believe some of the crap you’ve been through over there. Following you now on Pinterest! Good for you for making the move. 🙂
Christy
God bless you BWF!!! I love your posts on your blog and Facebook. I should print and read this one every morning, as I find myself often checking Facebook for messages or posts to our local homeschool groups, and then getting sucked in for hours. Aaakkkkk!!! Why am I still on the computer at almost 1am when my eyes are so tired? I’ve never checked out Pinterest, as I don’t want another timesucker. I’ll check it out on your recommendation. It’d be nice to pull the plug on FB… I’m really thinking I should pack away the modem for the benefit of the whole family. Thanks for the superb reminder to rein in these things that can really distract from what’s most important. By the way, I agree with about everything you say, and am addicted in a good way to babies, gentle birth, etc, etc. 🙂
Tomi Jean Vaeth
Good for you & Congrats! Thank you for what you have done to encourage me after a traumatic birth but also thank you for showing what healthy priorities are.
Cassidy
I deleted my Facebook about 2 months ago and it was the best decision I have ever made! I have so much more time for my family! Facebook is great in moderation but so few people keep it that way. I, too, I sobered pinterest shortly after leaving Facebook. It is a nice “transition” site. I love it! Plus, the ideas for all my Christmas presents came from there! Congrats mrs. BWF! I’m very happy for you!
Nicole
I’m so happy for you to be doing what you want, but I must admit I have this selfish little part of me that’s screaming “But I’m having this baby AT HOME, and UNASSISTED because YOUR blog supported me and now I’m alone with only a week or two to go!” But if there’s one thing I’ve learned on this blog it’s that I can birth this baby easily if I just calm my mind. Maybe this post is exactly what I needed afterall, a reminder to calm my mind.
Thank you.
Melissa
This was a wonderful post to write! I know the feeling! I went off of Facebook for 2 weeks! It was wonderful. I had so much time on my hands and paid more attention to my four children and husband. I came back on due to friends in other countries complaining about not being in touch with me anymore. The truth is, I should have stayed off. I should have told them to e-mail me or *gasp* call me. But I didn’t. I am now back on and it does eat away my time. I should really set a schedule for it. Thank you for reminding me of that. I said it when I first went back on FB but never followed through. Your post here has reminded me of that and I will be doing that from now on. I thank you again! Much love! <3
erica M.
hello dear,
it really has been a beautiful journey to watch evolve…i know that it hasn’t always been easy and in fact i know you probably had some days where you’ve absolutely hated it all and just wanted to wipe your hands clean. the “birth” and growth process of BWF FB page and blog has enriched mine and thousands of moms lives all over the world (literally). I can’t tell you how many soon-to-be or new moms i’ve sent you’re way…i do that because i trust you, i trust your advice, i trust your love for birth. God has created you for something great and you have been able to share this greatness with the world and that is just what he wants us to do:) he’s pushing you in different directions and opening/closing doors…it takes a real woman to accept this and be vulnerable to new things HE has planned for us. Thank you January for being the kick ass momma, woman, wife, friend, and mentor to many that you are.
blessings~
erica m~
Jen @PlusSizeBirth
You’re one smart lady! I’m glad you’re finding a more of a balance and happiness! I just might have to follow your lead…
Laura R
Love you! You seem more at peace!!
Caroline
I just went off facebook too and suddenly began to feel more in control of my life. It is an artificial world there even more than the blogosphere. On FB we break our lives down to little soundbites with spin on them making us brighter and more sparkly than the other friend, relative, competator, mother. Whose kids are the cutest, who is the most artistic, who does the grooviest things..too much trivial information. Also When I shared photos through a windows app and had to click “yes” allowing the app to collect all my data and find out who I am friends with and know their data would be collected it suddenly felt like a germ invested junk food place…
Kathryn Mattson
Just happened to stumble across your blog from a colleague’s facebook on chiropractic and pregnancy that was found here. I’m a chiropractor as well and the other chiro I work with has opened her office to midwives where they do their pre and postnatal exams. Great place to work and its been a great experience for me as a first job. It’s amazing how many women are uninformed about midwives, doulas, chiropractic or acupuncture care and having a natural birth. I grew up on a farm and I’ve been an avid animal lover all my life. My theory is if a horse, rabbit, cow etc can pop them out (usually) without assistance why not use? Anyway, love your site even though I understand why you are trying to move away from social media. Rest assured there is a community out there changing it one woman at a time 🙂
Mrs. BWF
Thank you Kathryn! Glad you found me/my blog. 🙂
January
Dr. Nancy, Your Birth Coach
I can relate. I am also a homeschooling mama and have had to take a break from the internet for a bit to maintain sanity in my family life. Good for you doing what feels right for you and your family. After all, that’s what this is all about. Raising our children in consciousness and you are leading by example, even if that example is to step back and just be the mama you want/need to be for you babes. Good for you!
mrsjmattes
i love this one im gonna steal that top “enjoy every single moment…” if you dont mind!! i love your blog and fb post xxoo mrsjmattes
Melanie
January, thanks for sharing with us on fb. I understand what you mean about fb taking up so much time. I’ve not been on nearly as much lately, but it sure served a purpose for me during school and being hundreds of miles away from family. I’ll be looking into homeschooling my daughter after I take Part IV this week, and then it is on to the next chapter in our lives (opening an upper cervical practice… woohoo)! Good luck in all you do, and I’ll keep reading when you feel inspired to share. Thanks.
Angela K
Thought this was timely, and thought you might appreciate it. Today on Facebook, Pastor Mark Driscoll posted the following: “If you help 10 people you get 1 critic. If you help 100 people you get 10 critics. if you help 1,000 people you get 100 critics.”
Considering how much you’ve been apparently getting flack for your stuff, please know that you are helping at least *ten* *times* as many people! Be at peace. 🙂
I’ll see you over on Pinterest. 😉
Angela K
P.S. That’s my husband’s face. I truly have no idea how to change it.
Becka
High five for quitting facebook…More people should. I prefer to call it facebitch… 😉 I quit about a month ago and am SO much happier without it. The day I deleted my account, it was like a weight was lifted off my shoulders, and I too, took my time (a lot less of it though) over to Pinterest. Much better and much more relaxed. I don’t plan on going back to the facebitch ever. I’d rather cook dinner and have clean floors for my crazy kids to tear up 🙂
Mrs. BWF
I couldn’t agree more Becka! 🙂
Lilly
You’re such an inspiration! I know so many of us thank you from the bottom of our hearts for all you’ve done. I birthed without fear this summer in the comforts of my own bedroom and I thank you for helping me accomplish that. Your blog and fb page really helped me get passed so much during my pregnancy. I feel like I journeyed with you. I too am homeschooling and spending less time on fb, good luck to the both of us on this next stage of our lives. God bless you and your family mrs. BWF 🙂
V.S.
I have tons of pins about pregnancy & natural parenting on my boards. I get most of them from your pinterest or blog or FB page already 🙂
Samantha Bice
So proud of you. 🙂
Emily
Much love, January!! I totally get it 🙂 God Bless you <3
Melinda
When I went on my month long hiatus from fb I became a lover of Pinterest!!! I’m so happy you are doing this for yourself and your family! I’m thinking about taking a small break before our newest addition.. Fb is a time sucker and a lot of it is just bad. I’m so happy to have been following you on Pinterest already and maybe I can send you my first home birth story soon :))
Stevie
I’m sad but I totally understand and still adore you and your work! Thank you for all that you do!
Laura O
Totally proud of you!
I’ll miss you buches!
I’ll add you on pinterest as soon as I figure it out.
<3 <3 <3
Mrs. BWF
You better!!!
Angela Gibson
I know you have put so much of yourself into helping others. I am proud of you for recognizing that you needed to step away in order to help yourself and your family have a healthy life. I still love your blog. Many thanks for all the work you do to keep it up. 🙂
Amy Black Bear
January and Family,
I LOVE YOU! and while I will miss you on Facebook, I completely understand you doing what you need to do. You started something that women did not believe could make it and it became more than you could handle alone, which affected your life and your family in a negative manner because you could not handle the pressure and that is OK. Thank you so much for everything you have done, I hope this thing you have started continues to grow and mature though and I hope you will continue in your own way to be a part of it. I also hope that I can still come to you for questions and support as you have impacted my life and soul more than you will ever know. I hope one day I can meet you even if its only long enough to give you a huge hug and say thank you before having to be on my way again. Your legacy is living on on Facebook because the ladies still need what you started including me. Keep it up please! We all love you and I will do my best to keep up with your blogs and pintrest, though Facebook is really my only oulet right now…its where all my family and friends are.
Amy
Mrs. BWF
Amy, thank you for your kind words! I am already happier, calmer and loving to blog again! I appreciate your continued support and love and of course I am always here for you!!! Take care (until next time)! 🙂
J
Loretta E
I just saw on Pinterest that your hubby is a chiro, so I had to come back and comment because I am too! Anyways, I’m glad you’re doing what’s best for you…
Trisha Ewalt
Good for you and your family! I enjoyed everything you and your group had to offer on fb while I was pregnant! Thanks so much! I will continue to follow you on here! <3
Ginessa Pierson
Good for you! I miss seeing your posts on FB but completely understand and applaud what you’re doing.
Reannan Keene
I am so happy you were there when I needed you <3 I am also so happy you are expanding and growing your life in the way that suits you and your family. I am glad I can still read your blog 🙂
Angie Tolpin
Wow! Honey! I love your heart here- this is just the 2nd post I have read here and I can totally relate. I have six children 12 and under and home school as well… my heart is to serve also and it is so easy for us to let those boundaries get blurry. You clearly have been impacting many women’s lives for His glory, but your first ministry is your family. I would love to connect more personally and be praying for you through this transition. God Bless Sister.