3 Ways YOU Can Help Birth Without Fear Empower Women

by Birth Without Fear on November 16, 2010

First of all, I just want to thank everyone for the tremendous response Birth Without Fear has received. The Birth Without Fear Facebook page has become such a hit and I am so grateful it has been a helpful resource for so many pregnant mamas. Because of that, I really had no choice but to start up a BWF website/blog which has also taken off. None of it would be possible without all my loyal readers, and for that I just want to say thank you.

My goal is to build BWF into THE top pregnancy/birth website on the Internet. That’s a big goal, but small thinking has never gotten anything important done in this world.

This is where you, the readers, the BWF community, can help.

1.) Comments

I love to hear what all of you are thinking. It’s a great way for me to know how women are being impacted by this website, positive or negative. It’s also a great way for me to interact with all of you outside of Facebook. Keep the comments coming. If you have never commented, please do. I really am interested in seeing what you have to say.

2.) Spread the Word

So far, in the infancy of this blog, I know when a blog post is a hit because it seems like everyone and their mother shares it on Facebook. If everyone reading this blog would share each new blog post on Facebook everyday, you never know who we could positively affect. But don’t stop there. Share it on Twitter, Digg, StumbleUpon, etc. Everywhere you can think of. Help me to make each blog post go viral and you never know how many pregnant mamas we could collectively help.

3.) Donations

BWF has evolved on its own over the previous months. First the Facebook page, now this site, and I love it. I love sitting down and knowing that something I write might possibly help even just one person. But it is a lot of work. Being a pregnant mama of four little ones myself, along with a husband who is starting a business (as well as maintaining BWF behind the scenes for me), things can be very tiring in our household. And especially now since the instant success of the BWF website. I am not complaining at all, because this is exactly what I want. But what I am asking is if you enjoy this website, and if you enjoy the Facebook page, a small donation would be greatly appreciated. It doesn’t have to be much, even a $1 donation is wonderful. But something, even if it is small, lets me know that what I’m doing is appreciated, needed, and wanted. This in turn will only add to my motivation in delivering the very best I can offer to pregnant women. You can click here to make a donation or click on the DONATE TO BWF tab above.

Once again, thank you for the responses already. Let’s continue to make Birth Without Fear a place pregnant mamas can turn to for support!

 

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{ 26 comments… read them below or add one }

little lady November 16, 2010 at 7:44 am

I love the blog, but I found the donations thing a bit awkward…

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Birth Without Fear November 16, 2010 at 12:05 pm

Little Lady, I agree it is a bit awkward. However, people have actually asked me to put it on and most blogs do have them. I am donating my time to help women and there is nothing wrong with someone wanting to donate back. :)

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little lady November 16, 2010 at 7:56 am

i mean I can totally relate to been swamped with household stuff, kids, laundry ect… but I wouldn’t take on such an endeavor if I new I couldn’t keep it up.
What about finding a co-moderator? someone who could step in for you, someone you could share this huge responsability with.
Just a thought. ;0)

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Birth Without Fear November 16, 2010 at 12:05 pm

We’ll have to see where things lead. Thanks for the input!

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mom November 16, 2010 at 7:57 am

I am going to have to agree with little lady, maybe finding someone to help would relieve some of the work load.

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mom November 16, 2010 at 8:03 am

I just love it! keep up the good work, and I hope you ll find a way to make it all work, it would be a shame for such an inspirational blog not to become THE pregnancy website on the internet….!!!!!!!
I have been telling all of the woman I know(little lady is my neighbor) about your blog! LOVE IT !!!

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Sarah November 16, 2010 at 9:15 am

Fear of birth is a huge problem in our culture, I would love to see this blog go mainstream. However, I cannot support you until you stop telling pregnant women that it is okay to drink coca cola and eat junk food. Poor nutrition is the number one problem in America and the reason so many pregnancies are not healthy. There would be far less complications and high risk pregnancies if everyone had the right information about nutrition, and knew the ramifications of refined chemicals on the human body. Sorry, I used to really like your message.

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Birth Without Fear November 16, 2010 at 12:03 pm

Where on this blog have I said women should drink coca cola and eat junk food? We have discussed this on the FB page and I won’t slam other ppl for their choices. However, I do not promote bad nutrition on this blog. If you don’t like the blog, that’s OK. Move on.

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mom November 16, 2010 at 12:09 pm

Never seen anything about telling moms its ok to drink coke and eat junk food……

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Jen C. November 16, 2010 at 12:19 pm

I’m confused…I don’t think BWF has ever promoted drinking Coke and eating junk food on this blog. This is a supportive blog helping women wherever they are in their journey….including ones that are struggling in their nutrition life. If BWF was preaching about perfect nutrition ALL DAY EVERYDAY…she would alienate a lot of women out there.
Keep up the good work Birth Without Fear….we appreciate the well-rounded non-judgemental forum you’ve created here. :0)

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Mae Redmond November 16, 2010 at 11:57 pm

Dear BWF,

Every time a baby is born, a mama is born too. I saw that idea on your forum and I just loved it. Birth is a sacred thing and I think that aspect of it–our children teaching us, the importance of the process itself–is so often lost in the rush for the goal.

I became interested in natural women’s health in 2005 and have been studying it on my own ever since. I went off the pill, fearfully but determinedly, after seven years of artificial hormones and began charting my menstrual cycles. Learning to listen to my body has been one of the most empowering pursuits of my life. Naturally, along the way I also became interested in midwifery. Now five years later, I’m a graduate student embarking on the road to my first BWF. Tonight I am in an Inupiaq village on the coast of the Arctic ocean. I am interviewing households here about how they share subsistence foods. Walking around the village and being in people’s homes, it is impossible not to notice how different their attitude towards having children is. Families are so positive! It is such a stark contrast to one of the university observations that, “This household makes more money because they aren’t hampered by children.”

And we wonder what’s wrong with our world?

I found your website through a midwife friend on Facebook who posted one of your blogs. I loved it! (I recently found PWF as well!) Being an occasional blogger myself, I know how important feedback is. You really nailed it: fear is what holds us back. I wholeheartedly applaud your efforts. I bow in gratitude for your support and inspiration. I look forward to embracing the challenges of motherhood and a BWF. Thank you so much for your attention, your heart, your hard work, and your sharing!

P.S. I saw in some other posts that you are feeling a bit overwhelmed? I didn’t get a chance to read them all and it’s not like I’m bursting with spare time, but this is a topic that really interests me and if you need some help, I do write a lot. I’d be happy to edit things for you or pitch in in some other way. Please feel free to contact me (reply to this post).

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Birth Without Fear December 1, 2010 at 8:32 pm

Mae,

Thank you for sharing your story and for the feedback! :)

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Ruth November 18, 2010 at 7:48 pm

Don’t remember if I’ve commented yet or not, but wanna give you some feedback… I love the site! Thanks so much for all you’re doing. Don’t let the negative comments get you down. You’re doing great, and I appreciate what you do. I’ll start sharing blog posts, etc on Facebook and possibly twitter more, and I’ll go mention it right now to my AP mothers online group of 150 that I’m a part of. Let’s get this thing viral! ;)

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Birth Without Fear November 18, 2010 at 8:59 pm

Thank you for your support Ruth! :)

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Stephanie December 1, 2010 at 4:05 pm

Dear MrsBWF…

I’ve only been introduced to you a few days ago… I’m constantly reading, devouring whatever information I can get my eyes on about natural, unmedicated, and unassisted births! I have almost read every piece you have written, and I LOVE all the information that is available all in one general area! (VIA Facebook/Blog Site!) The two go very well, and seamlessly together, and in my opinion, are just amazing resources for all pregnant women who are looking to educate themselves on the options that are available to them regarding natural, normal birth.

I pray that you continue on this endeavor, and don’t stop following your instincts as to what women want and need to read! You are doing a fantastic job here, and I really appreciate your dedication!

I look forward to sharing my own previous births, 2 boys, and our upcoming birth, a girl! with you as well! I am very much looking forward to an unassisted homebirth, and again… I so appreciate the encouragement that I have found in your forum!

Sincerely,
Stephanie Cawthron

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Birth Without Fear December 1, 2010 at 8:31 pm

Thank you Stephanie! It’s so nice to hear. It’s more work than most probably realize. :) I love it though. I’d love to hear about all of your births and admire your passion for educating yourself and trusting birth!

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Keely August 8, 2011 at 9:15 am

Just going back and reading your blogs. I hate that you can post such an amazing blog, and half the comments on here are negative.
Not even gonna comment on what I think in regards to that, as it will bring drama.
I just want you to know we support you fully, and you are an amazing Mom, and friend to those who TRULY know you! :)
If I had met you before I gave birth, I would not have gone down the path I had chosen, and known there were so many other options out there. BUT by meeting you, at the same time, you and everyone else helped me come to terms with what happened, and quit blaming myself. LOVE YA!

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Mrs. BWF August 8, 2011 at 10:46 am

Thank you Keely. You have no idea how much your support means to me. I appreciate you!

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Rebekah October 28, 2011 at 2:22 pm

Hey! I am new to this blog and I have to say, it is so inspiring! I had a rough first birth, I was 17 and had no idea how things were supposed to happen. My daughter was breech at 36 weeks, then I turned her but she turned back by 38 weeks, so off to the hospital went to have her turned by a doctor. It felt so wrong and I was terrified. The doctor said her heart rate dropped for a bit so she needed to be born soon and told me my choice was to wait and have a c-section, or to have a c-section that day. He was very adamant about his schedule and he wanted it done that day….so I felt guilty and agreed to the c-section. She was born at 38+2 weeks, and had a really hard time pinking up and breathing. I was given an epidural as well as a spinal block and I took poorly to the drugs and I was numb up to the eyes and ears. That was the scariest time in my life I think. I couldn’t breath, hear or see…I couldnt move. I think the drugs also affected my daughter and that’s why she couldn’t breath or move either.

My second pregnancy at 18 was with different providers, midwives. I was having weekly ultrasounds because my “amniotic fluids were too low” and at 39+6 weeks I was told my fluids were “dangerously low”. I was induced that night and at 40 weeks my son was born. But the labor was awful. Because I was induced with pit. there was a transfer of care and I had to have an OB for the birth. I was not allowed to move from my bed, I HAD to have an epidural and had no choice in the matter. My former midwife knew my past of being sexually abused and knew I wanted little to no contact for checks and if there was to be a check I needed lots of time to prepare for it. Well this doctor was told and didn’t think it was a big deal to come in and shove her hand inside me without warning. I was terrified and cried. I didn’t want to see her, I didn’t want to be there, I just wanted to go home and keep my baby safe and away from all these people that terrified me. Labor continued and I was ready to push. I epidural was wearing off but I didnt tell them because I never wanted it in the first place. I pushed and pushed with everything I had. When my son was crowning the OB announced she was going to cut me because I “looked too small for the job”. I screamed and cried and thankfully my midwife stepped in and brought the OB some oil and asked her to try that first, she did, and my son was born with only a small tear. Afterwards the OB told me I should have just had a c-section and it was too bad the operating room was occupied. I was happy to have my VBAC, but I wish it were under better circumstances.

Now I am pregnant with my third child and there is no question. I WILL have a natural birth, no matter what. But….

My question is…How can I help my husband to see how beneficial it is for a natural birth at home? You were lucky to have a supportive husband in that area. But mine is convinced that if I labor and birth at home I will die and so will the baby. I need him to be on board with this, he is my only support right now. THANKS!

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Mrs. BWF October 28, 2011 at 4:22 pm

Hi mama. So glad you found us! Are you on our FB page? I know what it’s like to have a disappointing VBAC (((hugs))). Do you have good support (midwife) this time? Would your husband watch the Business of Being Born with you? That movie seems to help a lot of people (including men) to step back and see birth different.

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Rebekah October 28, 2011 at 8:08 pm

Mrs. BWF, I will try watching that with him for sure! Thanks! I have a really great midwife this time around. She does volunteer work in Kenya for pregnant moms and it used to natural births. However I have yet to find out her policies of birthing in Canada since she works through an office here. :) I AM on the facebook page :) LOVE IT!

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Calonectris April 10, 2013 at 3:23 pm

Your blog has been a source of great joy and inspiration for me and I would like to congratulate you from the bottom of my heart for having empowered women and thus allowed so many babies to be mothered as the nature intended, right from the start. Bravo.
I read the stories every night before going to cuddle with my 18 month old who was born with a unwanted Cesarean, forced brutally upon me against all my wishes, refusals and pleas (I was begging the OB not to do it) and for NO reason at all…luckily, I didn’t suffer a PPD, she nursed less than an hour after birth and, hopefully, doesn’t remember much of the birth trauma. I do however carry a deep emotional scar, and heal reading your wonderful posts. Thank you.

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Katie Purves April 20, 2013 at 12:18 am

January,

I really don’t know how to thank you… You have opened my eyes.
Before I found BWF (a little less than 3 years ago) I didn’t know much about birth, I thought I knew everything I needed, as it turns out I knew even less than I thought.

I was wide eyed in the pitch dark without a clue of what I was looking at, unaware I was searching for answers.

Before I Found BWF this was my take on birth: You went to the hospital when your contractions started, you could try to go for ‘natural’ but as I was told ‘what are trying to prove?’ (I have always wanted a medication free child birth) from there I knew you were to lay on your back and push. After you would be handed your cleaned off baby. Viola!

I am a researcher (not a professional one, just at heart) I love information, knowledge, all of it!
About two and a half years ago my husband and I decided we wanted to try for our first child, but I wanted to know more… I needed something other than this box of “normal” I had been handed to work with. A friend of mine mentioned she was going to have her next baby in a squatting position. I will fully admit I though she was out and out crazy “Is that legal?!” I asked her “I don’t think doctors do that” I repeated over and over. She assured me it was all okay. My mind was going a million miles and hour.
I researched countless hours and in that I found your blog.
I found this site.
I found OPTIONS I didn’t know I had. I researched everything I found on your page, finding that I did NOT have to stay with the little box of “normal” I had been handed.
I cannot describe how you have changed my perceptions of pregnancy, birth and motherhood.
My husband and I have started the journey now of trying for our first child (Our first attempt was halted my both of us losing our jobs)
I am now going into this feeling prepared and ready for the journey ahead of me. Well as prepared as I can be. Without you, without the courageous women who have shared their stories and all the support I have found the past couple years I would still be afraid, not knowing the choices I have the right to.

So thank you! Thank you to you, to the amazing women who help run this site (One, who I have gotten to meet. Megan You’re amazing!)

Thank you for opening my eyes to the light.

Katie

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Jenny S May 11, 2013 at 12:19 am

I tried donating but there is an error! Please fix!

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Mellory Noelle June 3, 2013 at 5:58 pm

I discovered this website through my cousin, and I just have to say I am so happy to have this information at my fingertips. I’m not yet a momma, but I one day hope to be, and being able to read all the inspiring stories and getting accurate information is quite amazing. I’m not even mum yet, but I feel a connection to the people of BWF. Thank you for creating such an amazing website. = ]

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Sarah August 23, 2013 at 11:03 am

Thank you so much for this blog and website as well as the Facebook page. A girlfriend recommended the site and told me all about “rainbow babies” . As a woman recently experiencing loss, your site has given me hope, support and inspiration as well as the courage to try again. I love that your website allows freedom of information and choice on childbirth options. I am finding the information so helpful and valuable during this difficult time, thank you for being a wonderful inspiration to women everywhere. I hope I get to share the story of my future rainbow baby with you.

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