One of the things I have learned in my experiences birthing (and I’ve had them all), is that the support you choose is extremely important. Hiring an OB because everyone at church uses him or picking a midwife just because she is a midwife, is simply not good enough.
A woman should evaluate her personality, pregnancy and needs. She may need a huge support group of midwives, doulas, her spouse and family. Maybe she just wants her midwife and spouse. Having a supportive OB might be her best option. For me, I learned I need to have no one present except my husband. I need to be able to do whatever feels comfortable to me with no interference from anyone.
If you choose to have an OB or midwife, make sure you pick one that is absolutely on board with your feelings and thoughts on birth. If your care provider is not in agreement with you, this WILL effect your pregnancy and birth. If they have fears that are going to be brought into your birth, those fears (even though they are not yours), WILL effect your labor and birth.
Finding the Right Care Provider for You
Have a list of things that are important to you. Pay attention to HOW the OB/midwife answers you. If you hear things such as, “Oh, we’ll see…” or “We’ll give you a trial of labor” or “This is how we do things”, those are red flags.
Here is a list of six great questions to get you started. Word them as if you want to know how they feel and take notes:
1.) “How do you feel about natural birth and a birth plan?” Pay attention to how they answer this one. How they truly feel about birth can be revealed in their answer.
2.) “I am curious as to what your transfer rate is” (for a midwife) or “what your c-section rate is” (for an OB). Don’t let them deflect answering this question!
3.) “In what situations do you feel an induction would be necessary?” Remember that being post due date, your midwife going on vacation, and a big baby are not a good reasons to induce.
4.) “Is there anything that may come up that you are NOT comfortable with?” For example, vaginal breech birth, post dates, etc.
5.) “Are you comfortable in supporting me in how I choose to birth?”
6.) If you are a VBAC mama, you may want to ask first if they even support that. If not, move on. If yes, then ask questions and see how much they trust your body’s capability of VBACing.
If you see any red flags or if something doesn’t settle well with you, walk away. Even if you have already hired your care provider, it is never too late to release them as your support and hire someone else. I have known women who have done this even up to 39 weeks and were very happy they did. I also know women who did not listen to their gut and regretted staying with that care provider. Always listen to your instincts. Always!
You are preparing for YOUR birth. The OB or midwife you choose does not have to live with the outcome of your birth experience. You do! This is YOUR body, YOUR pregnancy, YOUR birth, YOUR baby. Take responsibility for educating yourself, letting go of fears and gaining faith and being strong in how you choose to birth!
Recommended Reading
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Vaginal Hospital Birth of TRIPLETS
The Birth of Ruby {Planned Natural Birth, Unwanted C-Section}
Two Amazing Hospital VBAC’s!!!
Blessed With Another Pregnancy
Your Body, Your Birth, Your Baby
VBAC Despite Thrombocytopenia: The Birth of Elodie- A Natural Hospital Birth, A Peaceful Miscarriage at Home, and A Future Homebirth Coming Soon
- The Birth of Luna Pearl: A VBAC Story from Home to Hospital
14 Comments
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Karen
Hi, I’m really loving your blog and the facebook page. I am wondering though what difference being in a high risk category such as GD makes to how much say I can and should have in labour? I am currently 29 weeks and am scared I’ll be pushed unnecessarily into c-section or being induced. If baby is in danger, of course I want to do whats best. Can I still rely on my own instincts and my body or will I need to listen more to the medical team?
Karen
studentmidwifey
Hi Karen,
If for some reason you doubt the accuracy of your test, try doing finger prick monitoring for a specific amount of time with your normal every day intake. Or just ask for a retest. I hate the glucose tests because fasting a pregnant women for that long isn’t recommended normally, and then to overload her with sugar is just…well wow! Remember, you are always in control of your body and if you have any doubt or want something else, find someone to help you achieve the birth you want.
Talk to your provider and find out what their proposed plan for treatment for GD is. See if they have any recommendations on labor and delivery based on your positive GD testing. And be prepared that if you retest for negative, some will still try to hold that positive test against you. You still have plenty of time to find another provider if you discover the two of you done mesh.
Also, have you looked into the Brewer’s Diet? It’s fantastic!
Here’s a great site to get you started:
http://www.drbrewerpregnancydiet.com/id33.html
Rachel
I drank about 1.5 tablespoons of coconut oil (melted in warm water) the morning of the GD test and passed with flying colors (fat slows everything down, and coconut oil is a wonder anyway). Probably would have either way. I wasn’t told to fast, but my medwife (yep, a Kaiser CNM) did advice me to avoid sugar and refined starch for the 24 hours prior. Good tip.
Karen
Thanks for your replies 🙂 I definitely have GD so my question wasn’t really answered but thanks anyway.
Susan Peterson
Karen, I can see that your question wasn’t answered. If you follow your diet, take the medications you are supposed to, and keep your blood sugar under control, you should have a perfectly healthy baby. You still deserve to have the kind of labor and delivery you want.
If there is pressure on your for an early induction ask for a biophysical profile to make sure your baby is still healthy and try to hold out for going into labor on your own. Try to find out everything you can about GD and how it affects the baby and placenta so that when you are given advice you know whether it is soundly based or not. This will also enable you to ask informed questions. Don’t be afraid of asking, or ask anyway even if you are afraid.
Besides trying to avoid induction unless there is a clear indication that baby needs to come out, see if you can plan for mobile monitoring. Some hospitals have telemetry monitors which you can wear while walking the halls. Birth is just so much more painful when you are stuck in bed. I would say that those would be the two most important things to negotiate for. Also, if you have to be induced, ask if you can have a slow, gentle induction, and if the pitocin can be turned off once you are in labor. After all, if there is some indication that your baby needs to come out sooner rather than later, wouldn’t that be a reason not to stress him with hyperintense and close together contractions? Hopefully you will have a doctor willing to discuss all this with you.
I hope you have a healthy pregnancy and a wonderful birth of a healthy baby.
Susan Peterson
Karen Joy
Karen, your provider makes a lot of difference. It’s still worthwhile to ask these questions. FWIW, for my last (5th) baby, I transferred care at 27 weeks to an OB I felt I could trust. I was freaked out because I didn’t see him for the first time until I was 30 weeks, but it turned out to be a perfect decision. Don’t be afraid to transfer care if you need to!!
I was a moderately high risk, because I was 35 years old, it was my 5th baby (ups chance of hemorrhage), plus I had severe varicose veins, up into my vagina — vaginal varicosities (fun, fun!), plus ALL of my babies are at/above the threshold for macrosomia. (8 lbs 13 oz was my smallest, 10 lbs 0 oz my biggest.) So, I had moderate-to-high risk of hemorrhage, and that was a concern to my OB. My OB was generally very supportive of me laboring naturally, but I had to put my foot down and say, “Don’t even talk to me about inducing until I’m 41 weeks.” Now, I had *NO* intention of allowing myself to be induced at all, but I figured that would at least put him off. And, you know what? He never brought it up again, except at my 40 wk appt. 🙂
Do all you can to keep your blood pressure down, and your weight-gain down. By 28 weeks or so, your baby’s new development is all completed, and from here on out, your baby is just growing what’s already there and putting on weight. So, actually, you can gain ZERO weight during your 3rd trimester and it’s still totally healthy. I learned this from my OB! He put me on an extremely low-carb diet. I basically ate a primal diet (all fruits, veggies, meat, eggs, dairy — no refined sugars at all, no processed foods, no grains), gained ZERO pounds for my 3rd trimester, was not induced, and delivered my 8 lb 13 oz baby 100% naturally at 40 weeks/2 days. 🙂
I hope this isn’t a pointless comment! I never did have GD, but I am trying to say that it IS possible to labor with an OB in the hospital even if you’re high risk. You just have to be really diligent about your own health, and you have to choose the right OB who *TRULY* supports you in your desire to birth naturally.
Kali
I linked this to my wall. This is excellent!
Becca
While I was pregnant I read everywhere about choosing the right person to attend your birth. This brought me to tears several times out of shear frustration! Here in Regina Saskatchewan we are limited in our choices at the time we had no midwives, we now have one, and you get referred to an obgyn but that rarely means that will be the dr at your birth!! My dr at my birth was some man I had never even seen before let alone had a conversation about my wants and needs for a happy birth. It sucks but I did the next best thing (I was not comfortable with an unassisted birth) I hired a fantastic doula and had a very supportive husband. We wanted delayed cord clamping so after my sons birth the dr went to clamp the cord and both my husband and doula shouted no! I was so cinfused I thought I had done something wrong!! Ha ha
Xylina Weaver
With my last baby, I interviewed my midwife on my due date, hired her the next day and had my baby the next! It was abosolutely the right thing to do and I would do it again! Trust your gut mamas!!!
Shandi
I changed care providers at 20 weeks because my OB stated “you can’t give birth in any position other than lithotomy because I need access” and “I can’t let you tear naturally. If I see the need for an episiotomy, I will do it.” I ran for the hills. I hired my fantastic midwife who is all about MY needs, and she even told me she’d be the bouncer if unwanted people try to show up at my house while I’m in labor. 🙂 It’s also nice that my husband is so comfortable with her he doesn’t feel like he needs to fight her or protect me from her, and that’s exactly how he felt at the OB’s office. He wouldn’t let me go to the OB alone because he wanted to make sure they listened and didn’t try to fill my head with BS.
Sarah
I changed OBs at 35 weeks. Best decision ever!!! Had my ideal unmedicated birth at 41 weeks and 1 day. My former OB wanted me to induce no later than 41 weeks. Thank goodness I switched!
Janet
So what happens when you have a wonderful midwife and doula who support your choices and that you are very happy with, but it’s your husband who is the one who is against it? I want a home water/hypno birth and he wants me in the hospital with an epi (like our first – I was completely uninformed about my options with ds). We live 9 blocks from the hospital so I am not concerned about safety, and the main reasons for having a home waterbirth is that you do not have that option in the hospitals here (there are no birth clinics), and I have back and hip issues that cause me pain on a daily basis (pre-existing) that I would like to have the water for to help with joint relief. I’ve tried talking with him, but it never ends well.
Rene
Janet – I’m curious as to how your story turns out? We’re not pregnant yet but husband is already against anything other than hospital w/epi. I’m wondering as you were, what to do to get him to see that it’s possible to do it another way. Especially being that you were so close to the hospital.